Tortured Embrace Read online

  She felt a sudden awareness, a tingle at her nape and knew he’d spotted her watching him. His dark head moved a fraction of an inch, and she found herself wishing she could see his face. An eternity passed as they gazed toward each other before she withdrew from the window.

  When they’d last spoken, she’d sensed his distance. Where do they go from here? He worried for her constantly and as thoughtful as it was, she didn’t want him to see her as a poor battered woman he needed to take care of. She wanted him to see her alluring, attractive, strong enough to handle all the things that came with his life.

  The last three months were horrid, but it also made her realize how precious and short life was. Having cared for the beta for most of her life, it was high time she did something about it. She thought of his arms around her, the feel of his body pressed against hers, the heady smell of him, and she closed her eyes feeling as though she were in his embrace right now.

  She didn’t know how, but Serena was going to make it clear to him there was no way she was letting him go.

  He cared for her. Of this, she was certain. Now she had to figure out how to make it work before he slipped away.

  After her workout and hearty breakfast, Adam accompanied Serena to Ben’s family home before dropping her off at work. Together they relayed all the details of their capture, and Ben’s heroic role in her escape. There was no need to tell her about the moon heat and the baby they’d lost. Ben’s wife and children had enough grief to deal with.

  They watched with heavy hearts as Ben’s wife tried to remain strong in front of them, until the woman succumbed to the pain and finally broke down. Serena went to her, gathering Ben’s wife in her arms. She loathed leaving the widow alone, and held her for several long minutes. She told herself she was comforting the woman, but Serena knew it was the woman’s embrace that gave her solace.

  Sometime later, with swollen eyes and a hole in heart, Serena returned to work. The employees at the library welcomed her back with open arms and, thankfully, with no inquiries as to where she’d been. She suspected her brother had something to do with their lack of questions. It was odd going back to her normal routine at the library. Having felt disoriented all day, she’d made about ten different mistakes. She supposed it would take time to adjust to a common workday, just like everything else.

  There were moments when she felt together, calm, content, and suddenly another horrific image would assault her, the cold panic constricting her lungs. Several times she’d run to the bathroom to take deep breaths, fighting the tears, fighting the memories.

  When she returned home later that evening, she forced a cheeseburger and fries she’d picked up at a drive-thru down her throat, then curled up on the couch, fully clothed. In an instant, she was out.

  The next few days followed the same pattern, yoga, work, yoga, work… She continued to wake in the night, but after the fifth day back home, she was waking less and less.

  Dr. Moros came to visit for a check-up and referred her to a psychologist he held in high esteem. She met with him once and after an hour of reliving all the details of her abduction, Serena walked out of the session uncertain as to how she felt about it.

  He’d given her a few breathing exercises to do at home and encouraged her to get back into the normal swing of things, but wasn’t she doing this already? Before she judged the whole therapy session unhelpful, she’d give it a couple more times.

  Her nerves still troubled her though. The anxious knots in her stomach, however, were not because of the witches’ torture, but due to the fact she had not seen Jason.

  Serena knew he was never far, but she hadn’t actually seen his face. It was frustrating to know he was so close, but she couldn’t see him, talk to him, touch him…

  Walking up her front steps a week later, Serena felt a familiar presence lurking nearby.

  Squinting to the right, she reached out her senses, homing in on the human who had spied on them by Adam’s round house. What was he or she doing here? Initially she’d thought they were spying on her brother, but now she felt the stranger’s attention on her.

  Alarmed now, she fumbled with the key pad, entering the wrong code a few times, her eyes never leaving the direction the human…

  Her hand froze as a number of emotions ran through her. All at once she was, thrilled, worried, angry, and sad. It was this melancholy that gave her pause, the wretched feeling overpowering anything else, only it wasn’t her, it was him. Yes, the human was definitely male. She picked up the smell of Old Spice coming from his direction.

  Who was he? And what did he want? Why was he lurking about feeling so distraught?

  She sensed sudden dismay and panic, then felt him slip away, glimpsing his shadow as he rounded the corner at a fast pace.

  Curious, she opened her front door and stepped inside her living room. She hung up her jacket on the coat rack on the wall and dropped her purse on the small console table. Serena wondered if she should be afraid, but there hadn’t been any hostile feelings from the man. Besides, after everything she’d been through, a human spying on her was just a drop in the bucket. Though, something would have to be done.

  Heading into the kitchen to pop a frozen dinner in the microwave, she was about to call her brother’s cell when an intriguing thought entered her mind. She stopped scrolling for his number and just stared at her phone, the corner of her mouth curling up. Before she could think any further, she typed a text to Jason: Hi Jason. Are you on patrol tonight? The human from the other day is spying in my neighborhood. It’s a man. Gonna get a closer look. Serena.

  Barely containing a smile, she tossed her dinner in the microwave and leaned back against the counter, waiting.

  It took seven seconds to receive the following text—Stay n the house! Don’t move. Lock doors and set alarm. Don’t leave ur house Serena. I MEAN IT!—two minutes to pick up Jason’s fear and anger nearby and by the time her microwave dinged four minutes later, he was at her door.

  Biting her lip nervously, she fidgeted as she entered the living room, taking a quick glance at the round mirror above the console. She’d gotten a haircut two days ago, and it fell in soft layers around her face, cascading a few inches past her shoulder blades. No longer pale, Serena thought her cheeks looked less gaunt. They were fuller and rosy with excitement. Her eyes weren’t so wide anymore, although a slight gloom still lurked in their depths.

  She adjusted the black turtleneck she wore, tucking it into her skirt, somewhat pleased with her appearance. With a deep breath, she opened the door.

  Her heart leapt at the sight of him. His dark brown hair windblown, yellow eyes glowing, Jason stood, panting slightly in a tattered black t-shirt and holey jeans with splashes of spackle and varnish.

  A white dusting of some kind covered him in splotches, his forearms, hair, on his left cheek… My God, Jason never looked so appealing to her than he did right now. She pictured him hard at work on a construction site, his strong hands handling a tool as his muscles rippled with the physical effort.

  Serena had known Jason all her life, but every encounter still made her light-headed. The teenage crush that began years ago only intensified day after day.

  “You didn’t set the alarm,” he stated harshly, his thick arms throbbed right before her eyes, his shoulders heaving from his race here.

  Mouth slightly open, Serena stared. He’s so big, she thought. Had he always been so…

  “Serena?” he said loudly.

  Shaking herself, she said, “You didn’t give me a chance to.” She smiled then, ecstatic he was here. “Come in.” Stepping to the side, she held the door wider for him.

  Jason didn’t move at first, his brow furrowing as his eyes turned back to hazel. Hesitantly, he stepped into her living room, ducking a little through the door and looked around awkwardly. He seemed oddly nervous now as if he would knock into something since he dominated the small room.

  She realized this was the first time he’d ever entered her home. Turning to
close the door, Serena hid her blush. As she pivoted back around too quickly, her face banged into his chest. Jason gripped her elbow to steady her, then let go. Chills went down her arm at his touch.

  He hovered over her, his posture tense. “I didn’t see the human. I smelled him about three houses down. What happened?”

  Trembling slightly at his close proximity, she stammered, “Nothing. I caught wind of him staring, and then he took off.”

  “Why the hell were you going to approach him?” he demanded, his massive shoulders looming over her.

  Smiling in spite of herself, she gazed at the gold flecks in his eyes, tempted to caress his hard jaw, twitching in irritation. Would he pull away if she tried to wipe clean the dust on his cheek? She held her hands in check, clasping them tightly together at her midriff. Breathless, she answered, “I wasn’t going to.”

  He jerked, but thank God, he remained ever so close. “You said you were…” Jason paused as he picked up her jitters from the ploy she’d made. Watching her carefully, his gaze darted back and forth from her left eye to the right.

  She couldn’t move, his powerful frame doing a number on her body.

  Jason stared for a long while, his features registering, cottoning on to the real reason she’d texted him. Helpless to contain it, Serena’s heart swelled with the love she felt for him, her body heated from his incredible scent.

  He was so close. It was torture not to reach out and touch his magnificent chest, those pectorals expanding with every measured breath he took. She could quite literally reach up slightly and press her lips to them, but he’d only pull away and she wanted him right where he was.

  Inhaling deeply, his pulse quickened as he read her emotions.

  Hazel eyes drifted over her face, lingering on her mouth. If he kissed her now, she would surely faint. How could she handle it? It was too much as it is to be so near him. What if she had another panic attack? Oh God. How embarrassing would that be?

  Glancing down at her chest, he said gently, “Easy.”

  Serena placed a hand on her racing heart, her eyes roaming over his shoulders, arms, chest, abdomen, back to his shimmering eyes…“I can’t help it,” she whispered.

  The silence ensued. Minutes, maybe an hour went by as they stood frozen in the middle of her living room, soaking up the precious moment. It was what they both needed, a chance to come together and wrap themselves in the love they shared. It was better than therapy. Jason was the only one who could cure her soul.

  As heartwarming as it was, this was the only intimacy he would allow. It was beautiful and agonizing, and she didn’t dare move. Her elbow still tingled from his touch, she couldn’t imagine what would happen if he pulled her to him. How wonderful would it feel to be in his arms again? It would be different now. The pain of the past had somewhat dwindled. Their next embrace could truly be about them. But in this instant, Jason’s visual caress was far stronger than any physical contact.

  The house quiet, the only sound was the occasional car passing and their ragged breaths. And yet, his gaze never left hers. His expression struggled between solemnity and warmth, agony and love. Serena would give anything to know what he was thinking at this very moment.

  Sensing how much he cared for her, she also felt restraint, as though he were fighting an internal battle. She watched his handsome jaw clench several times, his breathing labored as if at any second he could crack.

  Memories of Jason flooded her mind, and she thought of the very first time she no longer saw him as just her brother’s friend, but as a stunning, attractive man, the moment her feelings had truly begun to grow.

  She’d always thought he was handsome, but growing up with him watching over her, Serena’s schoolgirl crush had been innocent, until the day she spied him shirtless coming out of the meadow by the round house after a run with Adam. She’d faltered at the kitchen window, mouth agape.

  Serena watched him playfully punch her brother on the arm as they laughed at something Adam said. It was the few times she had seen him smile, relaxed and invigorated after his run. His smile could make the fiercest nun blush. It was mesmerizing.

  He slung his shirt over his shoulder and meandered barefoot toward the house, his body tanned and perfectly muscled with perspiration running down his chest.

  Adam had caught her staring from the window and picked up her embarrassing arousal. Mortified, she’d been helpless to hide her flushed cheeks when her brother walked into the house, which had led to their argument in the kitchen that evening.

  My God, how those feelings had multiplied. It was a wonder they had managed to stay apart for so long, particularly since, seven years ago, standing on her brother’s porch with her ex-boyfriend, she’d realized Jason returned her affections. On that very night, she vowed to remain faithful to only Jason.

  The man standing before her, melting her with his searing gaze was the love of her life. And the possession in those hazel eyes told her she was his.

  It was a long while before they spoke, Jason’s deep tenor breaking the silence. “You look well.”

  Serena gave him a small smile, not trusting her voice just yet.

  “Please tell me you’re okay,” he asked softly.

  Angling her head as she continued to gaze at her amazing man, she said, “I’m better.”

  Nodding slowly, his jaw flexed. He was going to leave. She felt his regret and an incredible sadness laced through her.

  Jason closed his eyes, his expression tight, massive shoulders moving up and down. “I have to go, Serena,” he murmured.

  Her throat closed, unable to speak, she tried to put on a brave face. Say something, dummy. Make him stay. Staring mutely, she couldn’t help herself. A hand moved in slow motion to the left side of his face, her thumb made contact first as she brushed away the white dust on his perfectly sculpted cheekbone in slow, agonizing strokes.

  Jason flinched slightly, but didn’t move, eyes still shut. Waves of arousal drowned them, a cyclone of heat building between them. Her breath caught at the look on his face. All too soon, he opened his eyes, his focus steady on her as he took her palm lightly from his cheek. Turning it over, he wiped the debris from her fingers. He held her hand gently between his thick fingers, his thumb moving slowly across the center of her palm.

  A curious sensation ran through her, straight to her very core.

  Jason froze the moment he sensed it, then let go of her hand. Taking a deep breath, his features less tense now, he gave her a soft smile, the same smile that had done her in.

  Her heart completely shattered.

  “Goodbye, Serena.”

  She drew in an unsteady breath. “Goodbye, Jason.”

  ****

  Kevin Goode stepped into his room at the Knights Inn in Wilmington. Shoving off his jacket, he tossed it onto the bed and plopped down with a heavy sigh.

  Removing his glasses, he rubbed his tired eyes with calloused palms. At sixty-five, he no longer traveled much, not that he ever did a lot of traveling. The last time he’d been away from home for longer than a week was during the war. He figured there was no reason to leave the comfort of his home to learn about different places when you could simply read about them.

  Massaging his aching shoulder, he stared morosely at the room he occupied. He hadn’t slept in a bed that wasn’t his in ages. The town of Wilmington was nice enough, but the impromptu trip was beginning to affect him in ways he’d never imagined.

  Wondering if it was a mistake to make the short drive down from Chicago, he debated going home. Kevin had recently retired from an old Chicago plumbing company after forty-three years of labor. It felt odd to have so much time on his hands. He wasn’t used to it yet. When you lived a life of solitude, work was the only thing you had.

  Standing, he bent down by the dresser to pick up his duffel and felt a small pop in his right shoulder.

  His doctor had been pressuring Kevin to have surgery for years, but it was too much of a bother. Besides, the thought of recupera
ting in a hospital alone with no visitors, no one sitting vigil at his side, depressed him.

  He doubted his son would fly from the west coast to visit him in the hospital. He was lucky if his son returned his calls at all. Every time Kevin mentioned taking a trip out west on the rare occasions he’d reached his cell, his son would find an excuse to refuse him.

  It wasn’t his son’s fault, really. Kevin’s ex-wife cut the line of communication as soon as they’d divorced thirty years ago.

  Now, he was a stranger to his own son. He’d never even met his grandson.

  Rummaging through his bag, he took out the photo he’d printed off the Internet, and his heart nearly stopped.

  The girl in the picture had brown hair and brown eyes. She was seated at a desk, holding a book open, as if she were about to read it to the photographer, smiling playfully at the camera. He had found it on the Wilmington Library website. Bending, he placed it upright against the mirror on the dresser.

  It wasn’t fair.

  Life, love, loss… Not. Fair.

  He hated how his thoughts turned morbid, but what else could he focus on, but the girl in the photo?

  No. He wasn’t going anywhere. The trip to this town had been a must.

  Looking away, he idly pulled the revolver from his duffel, staring at it a long while as he turned it over and over in his hands. What he was doing was wrong, but he couldn’t help it. Fisting the handle, he stepped to the window.

  Yeah, he’d have to man up and get it over with, he thought, his hands trembling slightly.

  Serena Perez was in for the shock of her life.

  Chapter Ten

  Serena left work late the following evening, having no desire to sit alone in her living room daydreaming of Jason, or eating alone gazing out of her gaping window in the kitchen…daydreaming of Jason. She couldn’t step into the living room now without her heart squeezing from the memory of him consuming the tiny room.

  Feeling exceptionally irritated tonight, she entered her bedroom to undress. A quick glance at the electronic calendar on the dresser told her it was almost the full moon. Although, she wasn’t certain the moon’s effect was the reason for her agitation. She’d been edgy all day. No matter what she did, everything felt off. Her morning coffee made her nauseous; her tasks at work stressed her out more than usual, her walk during lunch made her anxious.